


On-Call Love

by Clexa15



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Clexa Endgame, Clexa Week 2021, Clexa Week 2021 Day 4, Clexaweek21, Clexaweek21 Day 4, Day 4, Day 4 At Work, Doctor Clarke Griffin, Doctor Lexa (The 100), Doctors & Physicians, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Romance, F/F, Fluff, Light Angst, Sexual Content, Smut, at work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 19:42:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29796924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clexa15/pseuds/Clexa15
Summary: “Fuck, Lexa.”If someone would have told Clarke six months ago that she would be where she is now, she would have laughed in their face.Because if they told you the world’s most infuriating person would be eating you out, in an on-call room, you’dneverbelieve them.orCo-workers Clarke and Lexa hate each other...yet somehow fall in love with one another in an on-call room.
Relationships: Clarke Griffin & Lexa, Clarke Griffin/Lexa
Comments: 18
Kudos: 305
Collections: Clexaweek2021





	On-Call Love

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! I'm so happy to be participating in Clexa Week this year! Last year I was in a very different place and Clexa was just not in my frame of mind at the time. Just very recently (a few months ago) I opened myself back up to Clexa and I can't tell you how much I've missed being apart of this fandom and writing for it! There are still so many people supporting Clexa and making new content for them every day! I've never been apart of a fandom so big and I love meeting everyone and making friends because, so far, everyone in the Clexa has been amazingly supportive of everything and anything someone does. It just makes me feel so warm to see so many people coming together after so many years. Anyway, I do hope you enjoy my contribution to Clexa Week 2021! Please let me know what you think in the comments and leave kudos! They're always appreciated! 
> 
> ****
> 
> This was a very last minute fic that I actually pulled from a small WIP. So I had a vague idea of what I wanted to do but other than that I just kind of started writing and let it take a mind of its own. A lot of this was written after a full day at work, staying up until 1 in the morning writing so there were a few instances where I was getting a little confused with some parts because I was exhausted. So I hope everything here makes sense! I'm actually thinking of making a smaller second part to this so I can dive into what happens after the events in this part! Let me know what you think and if enough people like it and would love to see more I might just find the inspiration to write more!

“Fuck,  _ Lexa _ .”

If someone would have told Clarke six months ago that she would be where she is now, she would have laughed in their face. 

_ Because if they told you the world’s most infuriating person would be eating you out, in an on-call room, you’d  _ **_never_ ** _ believe them.  _

Clarke carded her fingers through the head of curls that was currently clenched between her thighs, a guttural moan slipping past her lips. Lexa’s tongue flicked deliciously over her clit at the sound before moving away to press a few bites into the soft skin of Clarke’s thighs. Brilliant green irises peaked from behind lidded eyes, watching as Clarke’s face twisted into a scowl. 

“Why’d you stop?”

“Don’t worry,  _ princess _ ,” Lexa husked, tongue ghosting over her bottom lip to catch Clarke’s essence. 

Clarke’s breath caught in her lungs as Lexa stood and moved to wrap Clarke’s legs around her waist that had previously been over her shoulders. Though her body was slim, Lexa still packed plenty of muscle under all that smooth skin. Muscle that was currently carrying Clarke over to one of the on-call room beds. Any oxygen that she had sucked into her lungs was forced out as Lexa carefully tossed her onto the neatly made bed, her body bouncing once before being covered by Lexa’s. 

Lexa’s strong fingers ghosted along her inner thigh dangerously close to her core and Clarke clenched around  _ nothing _ .

“We’re just getting started,” Lexa smirked as she suddenly pushed two fingers into Clarke and let her lips close around her clit. 

Clarke’s back arched off the bed, hands flying back into Lexa’s hair as she stifled a low moan into her shoulder. She could feel Lexa’s other hand dance over her calf prompting a flash of goosebumps to break along her skin. Her hips bucked, trying to get Lexa’s tongue and fingers to move faster, but she was having none of it. 

Lexa’s hand moved away from her calf and Clarke suddenly found her own hands being pulled from those mused brunette curls and pinned above her head. Her mouth ran dry, jaw hanging open at the image of Lexa now hovering above her, one hand still lazily moving two fingers inside her. 

“Be a good girl and try to keep quiet,” Lexa whispered. “We don’t want the rest of the staff to hear, do we?” 

Before Clarke could respond a third found its way inside her and this time with a faster pace. Her fingers curled around nothing, Lexa’s grip on her wrists much too strong to break free, and she could barely feel the bite of her nails against her palm over the pulsing of her core. Panting breaths danced over her exposed breast, her bra having been discarded by Lexa practically the second the door had shut behind them, before a pair of plump lips enclosed around a rosy nipple. If possible, Clarke’s back arched further into Lexa, desperate to feel more of Lexa’s mouth against her. A soft bite around her nipple had an involuntary moan falling from Clarke’s mouth to loudly echo around the room.

Lexa’s lips broke away from her breast with a wet ‘pop’ before trailing over her chest and the delicate column of her neck before stopping to brush against Clarke’s lips. 

“Quiet, remember? Unless you’d rather everyone know how much you love for me to fuck you... _ Dr. Griffin _ .”

A lazy chuckle followed after Clarke pinned Lexa with a deadly glare and a huff. 

“Just hurry up,” Clarke seethed as she wiggled against Lexa’s solid hold. “We don’t have all damn day to be here.”

Something shifted as Lexa narrowed those emerald eyes at her, smirk growing wider by the second. Clarke felt the hold on her wrists disappear, fingers skimming through her hair, over her cheek and then suddenly settled over her mouth with a quizzical look from Lexa. 

_ Is this okay? _

If there was one thing about Lexa that Clarke both loathed and appreciated it was her ability to make sure that Clarke was always comfortable during their little... _ flings _ . She hated how Lexa was able to bring out the full truth of exactly what Clarke  _ wanted  _ and was  _ okay with _ , with a single look or simple question...but she also  _ loved  _ it. Despite their current hatred for each other, Lexa was never one to push something on Clarke that she wasn’t comfortable with. Each time she was asked  _ ‘is this okay’  _ or  _ ‘are you alright’  _ or given that all too familiar look she’d just given her moments ago, it was always followed by a rush of searing heat to her core. 

The hand at her mouth was almost a whisper against her skin until Clarke nodded her consent...then it was game over. 

A muffled moan slipped around Lexa’s strong yet gentle hand, only loud enough to resound in their own ears, as the fingers inside of Clarke picked up their pace and force. Clarke could feel, could  _ hear _ , the wetness that gushed between her thighs and all she could do to keep herself from bucking Lexa off her from the desperate movement of her hips was to desperately cling to her and pull her close. Her hands snuck under her shirt and clawed at the tan skin of Lexa’s back, the artist inside of her barely reminding her not to mark the beautiful tattoo that was inked only inches away on the woman’s spine. 

Lexa’s lips were at her temple, then her neck, smirking into the sweat slicked skin just under her jaw. A particularly hard thrust and a curl of those fingers had Clarke arching impossibly further off the bed, breasts pressing into the crisp white button up covering Lexa’s own heaving chest. It was all too much for Clarke, yet still not enough. 

_ She needed more. _

More of this infuriating woman who made her body thrum with unrestrained need. Clarke needed more of Lexa... _ Dr. Woods _ . More of her around her,  _ on her.  _ And once her mind decided what it wanted, especially when in the throes of passion, Clarke would do whatever it takes to get it. 

One hand trailed up Lexa’s back, stopping briefly to tug those tantalizing lips away from her neck, before taking a fistful of mused curls and  _ pushing  _ Lexa in the direction she wanted - _ needed _ \- her most. Lexa peered up through dark lashes, face smug as the realization of Clarke’s need became clear to her, and slowly nipped her way down Clarke’s body. The hand never strayed from Clarke’s mouth, something she was thankful for as Lexa took a hard bite just below her ribs causing a needy moan to slip from her throat. 

Before Lexa’s mouth reached where Clarke absolutely  _ burned _ to have it, she saw the other doctor glanced over her shoulder. Clarke followed her gaze to the clock hanging above the door to the on-call room, brain buzzing with the thought that they’d been in here for a shorter time then she’d thought. Though, moments like these with Lexa always seemed to feel like they stretched for hours. 

_ Or you want them to  _ **_last_ ** _ for hours. There’s a difference.  _

“We’re a little short on time since someone  _ insisted  _ on stopping at the cafeteria first,” Lexa breathed in feigned sadness. “I guess we’ll have to finish this later.” 

And before she could protest from behind those  _ marvelously talented fingers _ , they were gone. Lexa’s fingers slipped out of Clarke and she had to force a whine down her throat at the loss of contact. Her body pulsed with unbridled need that was being left unfulfilled and she glared at the taunt back of Lexa’s figure. 

“What the  _ fuck _ , Lexa? You can’t just…,” Clarke raged. “You can’t just work me up and then leave me high and dry!” 

Lexa turned, glancing over Clarke’s form with a deep scoff as she tossed the doctor her pants that had been piled on the floor by her feet. 

“I can say for a  _ fact  _ that I did not leave you ‘dry’,  _ Klark _ . Quite the opposite in fact.” 

“And that’s why you need to fix this.  _ You  _ caused it and now you’re just going to leave me with this frustration the rest of my shift?” 

The other doctor chuckled as she tucked her rumpled shirt back into her pants and straightened the collar, “You’ll live. It’s your own fault for taking so long when you  _ knew  _ you were meeting me here. I have patients to attend to and, unlike you, I don’t care to keep them waiting all hours of the day to see me.” 

One time...okay, maybe three times...she’d been behind on her rounds and the head of the ER had transferred a few of her patients to Lexa. Which, in turn, caused her ears to be assaulted by a heavy worded lecture from said doctor  _ after  _ she’d finished with the patients and Clarke was trying to focus on her last  _ two _ . 

“You act like I do it on purpose or every fucking day. I’m sorry that I actually stop to  _ talk  _ to my patients instead of just greeting them with a grunt, treating them, and then  _ leaving _ with another grunt,” Clarke seethed, her burning anger for Lexa flaring up. 

If she was being honest with herself, Clarke wasn’t too sure just  _ why  _ she hated Lexa the way she did. 

Maybe it was their introduction or the way Lexa had barely acknowledged her presence in the ER every day with as little as a grunt when Clarek took the initiative to try and make friends. Or maybe it was how Lexa always seemed to belittle Clarke’s knowledge of their craft and decided that her way was the right and  _ only  _ way.  _ Or _ maybe it was...Clarke shook her head to tamp down the raging thoughts. It was pointless really. She could go on and on about every little part of Lexa that made her body sizzle...and  _ not _ in the good way. 

Clarke growled under her breath as she stood, fixing her wet panties back into place with a grimace before pulling her pants up her legs. 

“Maybe I’ll just get Finn to finish the job since it seems you’re incapable of doing so,” Clarke mumbled more to herself, but still loud enough for Lexa to hear. It was a low blow, seeing as Lexa hated Finn far more than she hated Clarke, but Clarke’s pettiness wouldn’t  _ not  _ let her voice the choice words. 

The sound that bounced around the room was almost comparable to an enraged lioness’ roar and before Clarke had barely processed that the sound came from Lexa she found herself face down against the bed. Her pupils dilated as she felt her pants and panties get yanked down to her knees, her teeth digging into her bottom lip as her ass was cradled by Lexa’s hips. A calloused hand ran over the smooth skin of Clarke’s rear before dipping to catch the wetness that continually seeped from her core. 

“Like Finn could even make you  _ half _ as wet as I do,” Lexa husked angrily in her ear as she leaned over her back. “Let alone make you cum.”

Clarke’s body shook as Lexa’s thumb circled the swollen bud that was her clit but she fought against the sensation, trying to keep her head clear. 

“Well you’re not exactly doing that either,  _ Lexa _ . At least he has something I can  _ ride  _ to help get myself off,” Clarke panted. 

A slight pinch to her clit had Clarke’s squeal reverberating off the room’s walls, “You want something to ride? I’ll give you something better than that  _ boy’s  _ limp dick.”

Clarke wanted to laugh, given the fact that Lexa’s words rang true...not that she’d give her the satisfaction of telling her she was right. Her first sexual encounter with Finn -a stupid,  _ stupid  _ mistake from the beginning- unveiled his inability to ‘keep it up’ even after some... _ help  _ from Clarke. But Clarke couldn’t dwell on that thought for long as she felt Lexa’s hand disappear from her hands and went to angrily protest once more. 

Though, before any words could slip off her tongue, Clarke felt Lexa’s familiar body heat slide under her between her knees. A flush flared through Clarke’s body as she realized just what Lexa intended for her to  _ ride _ , and, given that her pants were now wrapped around her calves and under Lexa, she was immobilized and at her mercy. 

“You want to ride?” Lexa growled as she bit into the skin of Clarke’s inner thigh. “Then  _ ride _ .”

All thoughts of being caught in this position, of being heard by other members of their staff, went out the door once Lexa’s tongue buried itself deep inside of her. Clarke fell forward, one hand fisting the messy sheets of the bed and the other finding purchase in Lexa’s hair. Her hips stuttered as Lexa’s hands kneaded Clarke’s ass, nails biting into the pale skin and leaving little crescent marks in their wake. 

There was no stopping the roll of her hips or the guttural moan that fell from her lips at the sensations that Lexa’s tongue provided her. And, despite their activities having been halted for a handful of minutes, it didn’t take Clarke long to find herself hanging on that delicious edge she craved so badly. 

So ride she did. 

With wild abandon, Clarke let her hips take on a mind of their own, barely thinking of anything about the body underneath her other than the fact that she would  _ destroy  _ Lexa if she stopped now. Her back curved, pulling Clarke’s body back as she raised her head toward the ceiling, jaw falling open in a silent scream as her hips dug further towards the warmth of Lexa’s mouth. Blinding white light flashed behind Clarke’s eyes as she fell over the edge and a scream - _ Lexa’s name _ \- tore from her throat, raw and unhindered. 

One of Lexa’s hands raked down her back, raising welts that she would feel hours later, while the other wrapped around a single shaky thigh to hold Clarke in place as much as she could. Her orgasm seemed never ending, though it didn’t help that Lexa’s tongue still moved deep within her. Clarke’s lungs heaved with the need for oxygen and it seemed she couldn’t pull enough in as she continued gasping her way through the aftershocks of her orgasm. 

“L-Lexa,” Clarke panted above the doctor. “I can’t...I can’t. Y-You have to stop.”

Lexa hummed under her and Clarke was almost ready to fight her way off of her wicked tongue before she felt herself being flipped onto her back. Clarke’s head dropped back against the mattress and watched, exhausted, as Lexa gave a final lick to her core before standing. If even possible, Clarke felt herself become even more drenched as Lexa swiped a trail of wetness running down her chin with her finger and popped it into her mouth. A small groan fluttered past Clarke’s lips at the action and she found herself staring into the wild forests that were Lexa’s eyes, body clenching with more need.

“The next time you think about mouthing off about running to Finn for release,” Lexa said as she smoothed down her hair and walked towards the door. “Think about how only _I_ can make you scream, make you _cum_ , the way I just did. He can never give you that.”

And with one last glance over Clarke’s flushed body, Lexa was gone. Clarke stared at the door for what felt like hours but was only five seconds. She let her body fall back against the bed with a huff, bones heavy with the wariness her release gifted her. So many thoughts ran rampant through her mind at times like these. Lexa usually left Clarke to her own devices after their little trysts, never one to linger too long. Clarke thought maybe it was because of their... _ relationship _ , if one could even call it that, but the more she thought about it, it felt like something else entirely. 

Lexa herself was still a pretty big mystery to Clarke, never allowing her to get even remotely close to talking about their personal lives or interests. Everything between them was based on their introduction at work and the few choice words and arguments they’d trade while in-between patients or passing each other in the halls or while being forced to work together. Clarke had tried to be civil at first but could only stand for so much before Lexa’s broodiness had become too much, even for her. 

* * *

_ “Clarke, have you heard about the new attending joining us in the ER? She starts today.” _

_ Clarke’s attention was officially pulled from the patient’s chart in her hand as she cocked an eyebrow at Maya, the ER’s medical receptionist. _

_ “Why am I just now hearing about this? I’m always the last one to hear about all the gossip.” _

_ Maya giggled as she rolled her eyes, “I was trying to tell you the other day but that five car pile-up came in and by time I thought about it again you were already clocked out and gone.” _

_ Clarke scribbled something about her patient’s diagnosis before handing it back to Maya for filing.  _

_ “You could’ve texted me. Now here I am, two hours into my shift, which, by the way, is sucking ass, and learning that I have to put up with some newbie attending for the next ten hours,” Clarke half-heartedly pouted with a stomp of her foot.  _

_ Again, Maya rolled her eyes as she handed Clarke her next patient file, “You probably won’t even meet her today let alone work with her during your shift. I’m sure she’ll be shown the hospital some more before starting on patient work.” _

_ Maya had a point. Clarke, thankfully, had practically grown up at Ark Memorial thanks to her mother, so when it came time to start her residency she already knew the hospital’s winding hallways like the back of her hand. Most residents or newcomers would need to spend at least the first day or two being shown how to navigate from the locker room or office to their correct department. _

_ “Though maybe I’m wrong,” Clarke barely heard Maya whisper before the sound of her name being called distracted her.  _

_ “Clarke!” The young doctor whirled around to see old family friend and current member of the Ark Memorial board, Thelonious Jaha, walking towards her, all smiles on his face. “Can I borrow you for a moment? There’s someone I want you to meet.” _

_ Clarke was ready to voice her answer when the sight of someone stepping up beside Thelonious had the breath leaving her lungs. If one was to look in the dictionary at the word ‘perfect’, Clarke was sure that this woman’s picture would be somewhere next to it. The woman was young, probably a year or two older than her, flowing brunette hair tamed in a low ponytail, vast green eyes sparkling behind black framed glasses. Her clothes were crisp and clean, light blue button up tucked neatly into black slacks with a pair of brown loafers, all topped off by her stark white lab coat, name badge dangling proudly from the pocket.  _

_ Looking at the well put-together woman had Clarke cursing herself for not being more presentable herself. She stood, now self-conscious, in an older pair of dark green scrubs, the pants a little too long on her legs. Her white lab coat lay haphazardly across her shoulders, name badge pinned to the lapel of said coat by a safety pin all because her badge reel decided to break on her this morning. Though thankfully, by some miracle, Clarke had actually decided to put her usually wild blonde mane up into a neat bun atop her head...at least that part of her looked decent.  _

_ Clarke was broken from her current study of the woman’s form as Jaha finally reached her and clasped a hand to her shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze while pulling her slightly towards the woman.  _

_ “Clarke, I’d like for you to meet Lexa Woods. She’ll be the new attending working beside you here in the ER. Lexa, this is Clarke Griffin, the woman I was telling you about.” _

_ A hand moved to the space between them and Clarke almost felt like she was watching a statue try to move with how stiff the woman was. She calmly took it and tried not to let herself marvel at the soft yet calloused skin of Lexa’s hand.  _

_ “It’s nice to meet you, Dr. Griffin. Dr. Jaha has told me a lot about you,” Lexa spoke coolly before pulling her hand away.  _

_ A small smile settled over Clarke’s face,“Please, call me Clarke. My mother is Dr. Griffin. It’s nice to meet you. Maya here was actually just telling me about today being your first day here.” _

_ The air seemed to shift a bit as Lexa’s hand made its way into her coat pocket and hummed to acknowledge Clarke’s words, though said nothing else. Blue eyes darted from Lexa to Jaha and back again before chuckling through the awkwardness swirling between them.  _

_ “Well, since it’s your first day and all, if you need any help navigating through the hospital please, let me know. I’ll be more than happy to show you where everything is.” _

_ Lexa cleared her throat, back straightening as her hands moved to clasp her forearms behind her back, “There’s no need for that. I’ve already learned where everything is before transferring.” _

_ Something was starting to click inside of Clarke...well, more like crack.  _

_ Clarke’s eyes shifted over to a still smiling Jaha, who was obviously oblivious to what was starting to transpire between the two women. _

_ “Um, okay,” Clarke said with raised eyebrows. “Well, I’m still here for another ten hours, or more if things get crazy like they always do, if you have any questions or need to discuss any patient diagnoses or anything like protocol and such . I’m here to help.” _

_ The last part was meant more as a joke than anything. Obviously, Lexa was an attending, such as herself, and knew basic protocol for working in any medical building, or so Clarke hoped. She just thought to try and maybe get a laugh out of the woman.  _

_ Lexa side eyed Jaha for a moment before glancing back at Clarke with a hard stare.  _

_ “Thank you for the offer but I work best alone. As for protocol, I’m sure even one such as yourself would know that all attendings should know basic protocol, even  _ **_residents_ ** _ should know it. It was foolish to assume that I would not.”  _

_ And that something inside of Clarke...it snapped. Snapped in half like a twig under an elephant’s stampeding feet. Her fingers curled around the edge of her clipboard, knuckles white from the force and her nostrils flared with the deep breaths she was taking to squelch the bubbling rage threatening to unleash itself.  _

_ Though it did little to help.  _

_ Her mouth opened, ready to throw every insult at the arrogant son of a bi--. _

_ “Dr. Griffin,” Maya interjected as she stepped in front of Clarke. “There’s a patient waiting for you in room 3. Real nasty cut courtesy of a dinner gone wrong. I think we should get you in there to take a look at it.” _

_ Finally Jaha seemed to actually become useful again, “Of course, we’ll let you get back to it, Clarke. Come, Lexa, we still have a few more things to go over and then we’ll start you on your first round.” _

_ Clarke was thankful Maya was still standing in front of her because when Lexa turned to leave she threw a quick smirk at her and all she wanted to do was reach out and yank out a chunk of that brunette ponytail. She watched them walk away and once they’d rounded the corner, finally out of sight, did Clarke let out an angry screech. _

_ “Ugh, that...that  _ **_bitch_ ** _. Can you believe her? I was being nice and she’s all ‘even one such as yourself’. Like, what does that even mean? Did I do something to offend her or was she just being rude?” _

_ Maya sighed, finally circling back behind the receptionist’s desk and taking her seat. _

_ “Not that I heard, Clarke. I mean she looked nice but I guess looks don’t always matter,” Maya shrugged before sitting up in her chair. “Now I was serious about that patient. You should be getting in there.” _

_ Clarke groaned as she looked over the patient file and began walking towards the room, “I don’t even know how I’m supposed to focus on any of this now. All I can think about is stupid fucking Lexa. God, as if my day couldn’t get any worse.” _

* * *

_ Clarke was wrong when she thought her day couldn’t get any worse. It became downright terrible.  _

_ The whole ordeal with Lexa left her fuming and clumsier than usual due to being distracted by thinking of just what she was going to tell her the next time she saw the doctor. It left Clarke to deal with spilling her coffee while walking between patient rooms with no time to change scrubs, somehow dropping all her files and almost getting two patients mixed up, realizing that she’d forgotten her lunch at home leaving her to eat the horrid hospital food...the unfortunate incidents kept coming.  _

_ The last one being the face of Lexa coming to stand next to her at the receptionist’s desk, quietly talking to Maya as she swapped out patient files. Clarke felt everything bubbling to the surface the longer the other doctor stood quietly beside her flipping through the papers, completely ignoring her presence.  _

_ “Did I do something to offend you, Lexa?” _

_ The words were out before she could stop them but Clarke could find nothing inside herself that regretted them in that moment. Blue eyes jumped over to Lexa who continued to scan over the file in her hands, silently waiting for at least a ‘yes’ or ‘no’.  _

_ “It’s Dr. Woods, Dr. Griffin. And no, you have not,” Lexa finally spoke up after more than a handful of seconds had passed.  _

_ “If I didn’t do anything wrong then why the hell are you acting like you are?” _

_ Lexa looked from her file with a cocked eyebrow, “Acting like what, exactly?” _

_ Clarke stared at Lexa like she’d grown a second head. _

_ “Acting like you hate me. I offer my help and you turn me down, rather rudely I might add. I make a joke about protocol and you take it seriously, and then you’re all ‘even one such as yourself’ like seriously, what does that mean? Because I’ve been trying to figure it out all damn day. Then you call me foolish. It was a joke, Lexa.” _

_ At this point, Clarke was back to feeling the seething anger she’d felt after Lexa had walked away earlier that day. Her hands were just yearning to connect with that perfectly carved jawline that she also wanted nothing more than to run her ton-. _

**_Woah there, Clarke. This woman currently seems like she hates you. No time for any of that._ **

_ Lexa scribbled a few things over the file before closing it and tucking it under her arm and pinning Clarke with a cold stare.  _

_ “Once again, Dr. Griffin, please refrain from calling me Lexa. I go by Dr. Woods at work. As for the joke about protocol, I don’t joke at work so there’s that. As far as the foolish comment, I  _ **_was_ ** _ correct. It was foolish of you to assume I did not know it, whether it be a joke or not. Please refrain from any more jokes with me as well. If you wish to continue them then please stay away from me for I don’t have time for childish things. Now, I have a patient to see to, so if you’ll excuse me.” _

_ “Childish jokes? Excuse me?” Clarke raved. “I was trying to ease the  _ **_awkwardness_ ** _ you caused when you were being rude. So the joke wasn’t  _ **_childish_ ** _. I was just trying to be  _ **_nice_ ** _. Obviously something you seemed to not understand.” _

_ Lexa pinched the bridge of her nose just under her glasses, “I’m not worried about you or being nice, Dr. Griffin. I’m worried about making sure that my patients are well taken care of and that they go home healthy. I’m not here to play games or tell jokes. I’m here to work. Now, I’m done with this conversation so I’m leaving.”  _

_ Clarke was taken aback by the doctor’s words. They’d known each other enough hours to count on one hand and already seemed to hate each other’s guts. Well, at least that’s how Clarke felt. Lexa just didn’t care  _ **_at all_ ** _.  _

_ She stood stock still as Lexa breezed past her and down the hall. All of Clarke’s anger and spite suddenly flipped itself around, molding into hurt and embarrassment as she replayed the doctor's words through her head, watching as she disappeared into a patient room.  _

_ “Clarke?” Maya sounded softly behind her. _

_ Clarke swiped at the lone tear that streaked down her flushed cheek and squared her shoulders before facing Maya with a plastic smile.  _

_ “It’s whatever. Lex- _ **_Dr. Wood’s_ ** _ loss,” Clarke waved away the lingering hurt from her mind. “I’ve got to get to this patient. Lunch with me later?”  _

_ Maya nodded slowly, “Uh, yeah. Are you sure you’re oka-.” _

_ “I’m fine, Maya,” Clarke cut her off gently, shrugging as she backed away. “She made it clear she wants nothing to do with me, so be it.”  _

_ Without waiting for a response Clarke turned on her heel and hightailed it in the  _ **_opposite_ ** _ direction of her next patient’s room, hoping Maya wouldn’t notice.  _

_ She needed a moment to take her anger, frustration...her  _ **_hurt_ ** _ , out on an unsuspecting locker room door.  _

* * *

From that moment on, Clarke stayed away from  _ Dr. Woods  _ as much as physically possible. Though, it was kind of hard to do so when they worked in the same ER. There were times where they were forced to work together, where they  _ really  _ collided in a flurry of rude remarks and heated glares and maybe even a shove or two. Sometimes they found themselves so deep in butting egos that the head of the ER would remove them from the current situation at hand, and force them into a room together until they both calmed down. 

And, surprisingly enough, that had been the very thing that started these little trysts. 

* * *

_ “If you would have just let me do things my way, we wouldn’t be here,” Lexa grumbled from where she was leaning against the door of the empty on-call room.  _

_ Clarke’s head snapped towards Lexa, fury burning in her eyes, “The little girl already has a large cut across her face that will surely scar. Your way would’ve added even more scarring to that. Subcuticular sutures don’t leave marks or cross-hatching like regular sutures do! My way would’ve at least let the gir-.” _

_ “The patient was not yours to treat, Dr. Griffin,” Lexa hissed as she pushed away from the door, lips curling angrily. “You had no right to step in when you did. If I would have wanted a second opinion, I would have asked for one. But I didn’t because I know what was best for  _ **_my_ ** _ patient.” _

_ Clarke sprung from the on-call bed she’d been sitting on, fists clenched at her sides as she stalked towards Lexa.  _

_ “That’s just it! You  _ **_never_ ** _ ask for a second opinion. You  _ **_never_ ** _ ask for help, even when everyone knows that some patients need two pairs of hands to treat! You’re so far up your own ass that you probably just assume people think you don’t know what you’re doing when they offer their help!” Clarke fumed as she inched closer to Lexa. “Come to think about it, maybe that’s why you don’t want anyone working beside you. Because in reality you  _ **_don’t_ ** _ know what you’re doing.” _

_ That was an outright lie and Clarke knew it. She’d caught little glimpses of Lexa treating patients whether it be through a door closing behind a nurse or during the few times they were actually able to work somewhat side-by-side. Hell, Clarke had seen the moment Lexa literally used her own gloved fingers to clamp down on a severed femoral artery, courtesy of a resident removing a piece of rebar from the patient without properly checking the wound first. Clarke herself almost stopped working on her own critical patient from the same accident to marvel at the sight.  _

_ So saying Lexa didn’t know what the hell she was doing was as low a blow as they come.  _

_ Lexa was silent, eyes downcast and jaw clenched so tightly, Clarke could practically hear her teeth grinding. Clarke slowly reached out, mouth sputtering open as she tried to sort out an apology off the tip of her tongue.  _

_ “I-I...Lexa, I didn’t. Fuck, I  _ **_know_ ** _ you know what you’re doing. Shit, I was just mad an-.” _

_ “You’re right.” _

_ If Clarke hadn’t already been gaping like a fish out of water, she was now. The words were so softly whispered that at first she’d thought she’d imagined them.  _

_ “What?” _

_ Steely green eyes clashed with her own blue orbs as Lexa stepped closer, “I said you’re right. In a way, at least.”  _

_ “But, I…,” Clarke shook her head, confused.  _

_“My first thought for the girl was_ _subcuticular sutures but I_ ** _don’t_** _know how to perform them. At least not well enough to perform them on a patient just yet. The process is still new to me. I’m more of an...old fashioned doctor. Regular sutures and all,” Lexa sighed, hands wringing together, body easing from its normal tense state._

_ Clarke was pretty much stunned into silence at this point. This was probably the longest Lexa had talked to her without insulting her  _ **_and_ ** _ she had just admitted that Clarke was right. This in itself was a small miracle.  _

_ “T-Then why don’t you just say so? Why don’t you just ask for help? No one is going to judge you for it. No one is going to think you’re any less of a doctor,” Clarke pressed, feeling like she wanted to just reach out and grab Lexa’s hand in reassurance but stopped herself. “You can always ask me for help. I would never think less of you for doing so. Hell, I’d talk you through the process if that was what you were more comfortable with.” _

_ And just when Clarke thought she was finally getting somewhere with the other doctor, it was suddenly like they’d done a complete one-eighty. The stoniness in Lexa’s eyes, the one that Clarke could see melting away all of five seconds ago, hardened up again to their usual impenetrable fortress. Clarke scanned Lexa’s ridgid form, feeling like she’d been slapped in the face with a hammer by the sudden change.  _

_ Clarke finally did reach out, trying to grab ahold of Lexa’s iron fist at her side, “Lexa, I-.” _

_ “Don’t touch me,” Lexa growled as she snatched her hand away. “You know what, don’t even look at me. Don’t talk to me. Don’t...Don’t…I don’t want anything to do with anyone. Not  _ **_you_ ** _ , not any of the other attendings. No one. I’m just fine on my own.” _

_ Now it felt like she was being beaten with twenty hammers at once. What the hell was going on? _

_ “What are you talking about? Literally five seconds ago you were saying I was right. You owned up to not knowing to do a certain procedure which made it seem like you were  _ **_finally_ ** _ going to ask for help, that maybe we could start being civil towards each other and working together. But now you’ve turned around and gone right back to how you’ve always been. Honestly, I’m fucking confused and it’s making me feel like I have whiplash. I don’t understand you,” Clarke huffed.  _

_ “You don’t need to understand me, Dr. Griffin. You just need to respect my boundaries and keep your distance from me,” Lexa snapped, that little slice of vulnerability completely dwindled behind her usual cold features.  _

_ Clarke watched, stunned and above all, confused as hell, as Lexa spun and started for the door. Time slowed around Clarke, her brain replaying every little interaction with Lexa to try and figure out exactly what she could have possibly done to deserve this kind of treatment. There was no reason, at least one that Clarke could rationally think of, that could logically explain why Lexa was acting the way she was.  _

_ “Hey, wait!” Clarke strode forward, hand slamming down on Lexa’s shoulder and flipping the woman around so she could encroach in her personal space. “I’m  _ **_not_ ** _ letting you leave without giving me some kind of explanation about all of this bullsh-.” _

_ And just when Clarke didn’t think her brain could handle anymore confusion, Lexa was suddenly on her.  _

_ Lexa crowded her space, one hand curling around Clarke’s hip and finding purchase on the curve of her ass and pulling her forward, the other tangling through blonde tresses and tightening almost painfully. Their bodies met in a flush, Lexa’s chest heaving against Clarke’s own still one -since, of course, she’d stopped breathing by now- and suddenly her lips were trapped between Lexa’s.  _

_ The feeling wasn’t at all what she would have expected, not that she’d  _ **_really_ ** _ thought about it. Clarke has had her fair share of intimate realtionships and sex and was a bit familiar with what something like this should have felt between two people who hated each other. Where Clarke knew there should have been complete anger behind the kiss, there was just a hint of softness, especially in the way Lexa nudged the tip of her nose along Clarke’s. The hands that trailed over her body and through her hair were both harsh, pulling and gripping with bruising force, as well as feather light.  _

_ All in all, it was something she was slightly familiar with yet something completely different all in its own sense.  _

_ Lexa tugged at her bottom lip, backing away slightly before releasing it and waiting for Clarke’s reaction. Clarke could still feel Lexa’s hands on her and so she took the initiative and let her own hands brush over the doctor’s hips before running up the length of her stomach. Clarke sucked in a breath as she felt the tell tale dips and curves of a perfectly hardened six-pack, hand pressing down fully as the muscles flexed under her.  _

_ “Klark?” _

_ It was the first time she’d heard Lexa call her by anything other than her last name and it had her absolutely melting in her arms. Clarke was positive no one but Lexa could make her name sound like a wonderfully sinful curse falling from her lips.  _

_ She let her index finger slither up Lexa’s sternum, breath catching in her lungs as Clarke found the divide in her shirt, finger hooking into it and tugging harshly.  _

_ “If you don’t fuck me now, I promise you they’ll never find your body.” _

_ A light scoff was all Clarke got in reply before she was being lifted, hands cradling her thighs and urging them to wrap around strong hips. Lexa’s lips ghosted over the curve of her jaw, tongue flicking out to feel the stuttering pulse of blood flowing through Clarke’s carotid artery. _

_ “Like you would ever really kill me,” Lexa smirked into her skin. “We swore an oath when we became doctors, Klark. Rules say we can’t play God which means you can’t take another life.” _

_ Clarke gasped as she felt Lexa’s teeth sink into the column of her throat, “I never was one to follow the rules.” _

_ Clarke felt herself being tipped backwards, back suddenly pressed into the mattress, breathless as Lexa climbed over her. Her hands became trapped in Lexa’s iron grip above her head and her whole body thrumming with heat and need at the action.  _

_ “Well,”Lexa breathed along her cheek, one leg shifting to press itself between her thighs . “If I’m going to be fucking you then you’re going to be following  _ **_my_ ** _ rules.” _

_ Clarke’s head flew back, a moan raising off her lips as Lexa’s thigh pressed harder into her, hips rocking with a mind of their own.  _

_ “At your consent first, of course,” Lexa whispered. _

* * *

To this day, Clarke still couldn’t explain to herself just why she’d nodded her consent in that moment...well not entirely at least.

She could clearly remember the burning anger, the confusion, swirling around her chest with every thought of Lexa. But Clarke could also remember the curiosity to know who Lexa was, the want -  _ the need _ \- to understand why Lexa was so closely guarded and cold, the desperation to feel that smooth skin on her own after only touching for a brief handshake. 

And Clarke also could remember just wanting to hear her name fall off those pink lips with the little freckle on the top lip again as they ascended to that precious high together. If that meant the only time she could possibly try and sort out just what made Lexa,  _ Lexa _ , was when they were fucking, then so be it. 

“ _ Fuck _ ,” Clarke sighed as she sat up and stood from the bed on shaky legs. 

Clarke quickly composed herself as best as she could, making sure to stop and grab her bra and pull it back on while also silently thanking any high being that her hair would most likely not be in question thanks to it usually being nothing but wild waves by mid-shift. After a quick glance into the full body mirror to check for any needed fixes to her person and finding none, Clarke opened the door with a sigh and resigned to her having to go back to work. 

The ER, thankfully, was abuzz with patients and staff moving around like a well oiled machine and did well to help remove the lingering thoughts of everything Lexa. 

Well, maybe not  _ everything _ .

“You look like you had a good lunch.” 

Clarke chuckled as she leaned against the receptionist’s desk and took the file that Maya was holding out to her. 

“Just my usual lunch. Nothing special,” Clarke lied as she read over the papers. 

Maya hummed softly before reaching over to one of the many drawers on her desk. Clarke watched quietly as she shuffled a few things around before producing a small compact and holding it out to her with a knowing smirk. 

“Then you might want to cover up that not-so-special hickey.”

Clarke’s cheeks flared crimson as she snatched the compact from Maya’s hands and hurriedly studied her neck in the mirror. There, right at the base of her throat was a bright red hickey and Clarke just knew by the end of her shift it would be a deep purple thanks to the delicateness of her skin. She couldn’t even remember Lexa lingering long enough in that area to leave such a mark behind, but, then again, she wasn’t really focused on the sensations around her neck. 

“I don’t mind, obviously, and won’t say anything,” Maya chirped as Clarke began blotting the makeup to her skin. “But you know how much nurses and attendings gossip. You and Lexa will be the hottest news here since Dr. Jacobs had that affair with the radiologist if anyone finds out.”

Clarke nearly dropped the compact, “H-how did you know Lexa did this?”

“Please, Clarke. I can see from a mile away the way you two look at each other. Always eye fucking. And I’m not stupid either. You and Lexa  _ always  _ take a break at the same time and you show back up within a few minutes of each other. Not to mention that Lexa is considerably less tense when she comes back from her ‘break’. Oh, and this isn’t the first hickey I’ve seen on your neck. Woman likes to mark her territory, huh?” 

Her entire body flushed at the comment. Clarke couldn’t deny that Lexa liked to leave her fair share of marks, though most of the time they were in less  _ visible _ places.

“N-no, it’s not like that. We...we’re not…,” Clarke stuttered over her words, head falling into the cradle of her hands to hide her blush. 

A laugh of realization sounded from Maya, “ _ Oh _ , so this is a co-workers with benefits thing? Man, this just keeps getting better and better.”

“Maya,” Clarke groaned. “As much as I would _love_ , and by love I mean hate, to continue this conversation I need to go see my patients.”

Maya waved her off as she playfully snatched her compact off the desk. 

“Fine, runaway. But we’re not done talking about this. You’re giving me all the details on how you went from hating each other’s guts to fucking in your office.” 

Clarke smirked as she leaned over the desk, “You mean fucking in the on-call room. Beds are a lot more comfortable than a desk.”

She held in the full blown belly laugh that threatened to burst free at the blush that quickly covered Maya’s face. Clarke wiggled her fingers in a goodbye fashion and sent the woman a wink before skipping away from the desk and down the hall. 

Somewhere inside herself, Clarke hoped that Maya didn’t catch on to the fact that she didn’t deny no longer hating Lexa. A part of Clarke always knew that she never  _ really _ hated the woman...well, at least not as much as she previously thought. There honestly wasn’t much for Clarke  _ to  _ hate, other than the insults Lexa threw her way or the fact that Lexa outright didn’t trust her. But Clarke knew people had their own ways. She couldn’t fault the other doctor for doing things the way she was comfortable with, even if she didn’t agree with or understand them. 

_ What is wrong with you, Clarke? First you ‘hate’ Lexa and now suddenly you’re thinking of every excuse in the book to excuse her behavior? What is wrong with my brain right now? _

Clarke knew nothing was wrong with her brain. It was a simple matter that Clarke’s feeling of hate towards Lexa... _ wasn’t _ really hate. What she felt were the same overwhelming feelings of what she had swirling around inside herself since the moment she’d met Lexa.

Feelings of frustration, hurt, confusion, and...and…

“Dammit,” Clarke whispered to herself as the familiar burn of tears welled in her eyes. 

_ I’m in love with someone who I know nothing about, other than the fact that she hates me. _

* * *

Coming to the realization of finding out she was in love someone wasn’t as spectacular as Clarke thought it would have been. Where she thought she’d be enjoying a perfect passion filled night in bed with that special person, she actually found herself sitting on a bench outside of the hospital in the cold Seattle drizzle. 

Clarke watched the little drops of water drench the concrete around her feet, too numb to even care about the fact that she was becoming soaked as well. 

“Dr. Griffin? What are you doing?” 

If she’d been able to feel anything at all, Clarke would’ve felt the goosebumps flare over her spine at the sound of Lexa’s voice. She kept her eyes trained on her feet, not bothering to look as Lexa came to stand next to the bench on her left. 

“Did you hear me? Why are you sitting out here in the rain? You could ge-.”

“What do you care?” Clarke mumbled, shifting away from Lexa. “Oh, wait. That’s right. You don’t care.”

A shadow appeared over her, blocking the hazy glow of the fluorescent street lamp above the bench and . From the corner of her eyes Clarke could see that Lexa was holding her umbrella above her head, arm outstretched so as to not get too close to Clarke.

“ _ Klark _ ,” Lexa sighed softly. 

“Don’t,” Clarke hissed. “Don’t fucking say my name like you care. We both know that you don’t.” 

Clarke could feel Lexa move to sit next to her, “Where is this coming from? I just wanted to see if you were okay because you’re sitting in the  _ rain  _ for Christ sake.”

“‘Where is this coming from’? Really?” Clarke shouted as she stood, pushing the umbrella away. “Let’s start with the fact that you outright  _ hate  _ me or at least that’s what you make me think!”

Those beautiful green eyes that drove Clarke crazy widened, “ _ Klark _ , I-I... I-.”

“I mean, honestly, I don’t know what you think about me because one second you’re glaring at me if I so much as wave at you and then the next you’re fucking me in the on-call room!”

The rain began to fall harder around her, soaking Clarke to the bone and causing shivers to rack through her body, the water concealing the angry tears that streaked down her cheeks. The wind was icy against her wet skin and clothing, causing her body to fall prey to further numbness...not that Clarke could notice, not with the way Lexa was looking at her right now. 

“I don’t…,”Lexa’s jaw hung open with a shake of her head. “I don’t  _ hate  _ you,  _ Klark _ . This is just how I am. I can’t change that.”

“ _ Stop  _ saying my name like that! And don’t you fucking say you don’t hate me. We both know you do! Otherwise you wouldn’t act the way you do with me! You wouldn’t have called me foolish within five seconds of meeting me or said you weren’t worried about me only hours later. You wouldn’t have told me you wanted  _ nothing  _ to do with me, if you didn’t hate me!” Clarke’s voice rang over the beating of rain after concrete. “You wouldn’t  _ fuck me _ and then  _ leave me alone  _ in the on-call room a complete mess most of the time because I can’t understand how you can make me feel the way you do when you  _ hate  _ me.”

Clarke’s lungs stuttered with full blown sobs as she kept her gaze trained on a stunned Lexa. 

“Make you feel the way you do? What do you mean by that?”

A bitter laugh bubbled in Clarkes’ throat, “It doesn’t matter. It won’t change anything. You still hate me.” 

“But I  _ don’t _ ,” Lexa urged as she stood from the bench. “Maybe when I first met you, I did, but not now. You... Clarke, you  _ infuriate  _ me, frustrate me, to a point that it drives me crazy, and I don’t know why. I-I just can’t explain it.”

“Then why? Why do you insist on giving me the cold shoulder at work? Never asking for my help with anything? Or anyone else’s for that matter? Why are you so  _ cold  _ until you get me in that on-call room and all you want to do is fuck me?”

Lexa’s jaw clamped shut, muscles tensing under the smooth skin, “I don’t want to talk about it. Just leave it be. Just know despite the way I act I don’t actually hate you.”

“Leave it be?” Clarke scoffed. “Six months,  _ Lexa _ . Six months I’ve waited for you to explain to me the bullshit reason why you’ve been acting this way. And you’re going to tell me to ‘leave it be’? No, not happening. I’ve been so confused since the moment I met you, since that first day in the on-call room. You owe me  _ something _ , some kind of explanation.”

“I can’t give you that.”

Clarke’s heart slowed as she stared at the woman before her, those eyes cold and hardened as they settled upon her. More tears poured down her cheeks and Clarke felt the tension from their conversation practically suffocating her.

“Fine,” Clarke shrugged after a few heartbeats of silence. “Then whatever  _ this  _ is between us, what's been going on in the on-call room, it’s done.  _ Over _ . I can’t continue to watch you  _ act  _ like you hate me at work, even though you say you don’t, because it’s driving me crazy.”

Without waiting for any kind of reaction from Lexa, Clarke turned on her heel and stormed away. She ignored the cries of her name sounding over the thundering rain as she jumped into her car. Clarke wanted nothing more than to sit there and scream her pain out into the silent car but one look in her rearview mirror and catching a glimpse of a confused Lexa heading towards her car had her reversing out of her parking spot in seconds. With one last look out her window, seeing Lexa standing safely under her umbrella just a few feet away, Clarke fled the parking lot hoping the blackness of the night would swallow her whole.

* * *

**The Next Morning**

“Just make sure to keep that dry for twenty-four hours, the nurse will come back in with your discharge papers and more information on how to care for the sutures. Then make an appointment with your normal doctor about two weeks from now to have them removed. The other cuts should heal fine on their own,” Lexa explained as she wrapped her patient’s leg.

“Thanks, Dr. Woods. Next time I’ll make sure to wear better protective gear when out riding. I guess I got lucky to walk away with just a few cuts,” The man said gratefully.

“Very,” Lexa hummed, standing and removing her gloves. “I wish you a speedy recovery, Mr. Williams. If you have any complications or start showing signs of infection, please make sure to come back in as soon as possible. Good day.”

Mr. Williams called out his goodbye but Lexa was far past listening. She exited the room, swiftly shutting the door behind her and heaving a heavy sigh. After watching Clarke’s car disappear through the cold Seattle rain Lexa was left standing in the parking lot for what felt like hours. Her body had become frozen, Clarke’s words echoing around her in her ears, and for the first time in a long time...Lexa cried. 

She’d cried the entire way back to her apartment and Lexa was sure she had received some questionable looks on the bus but she didn’t care. All she could think about was that she probably lost the one good thing that had happened to her in a long time. 

And she was the only one to blame for it. 

“Here you go, Ms. Vie,” Lexa said, holding out the patient file as she reached the receptionist’s desk. 

It took longer than Lexa was pleased with for Maya to look up from her phone and grab the file. Something that Lexa found odd, seeing as to how she’d never seen Maya on her phone during her shift.

“I’m sorry, Dr. Woods. I’m a little out of it this morning. Clarke was supposed to be here for her shift an hour ago and she still isn’t here. No one can get a hold of her, not even her mother. I’m getting worried,” Maya confessed, her eyes going back to her phone which showed unanswered texts sent to Clarke. 

Lexa felt her blood run cold. In the time Lexa had been at Ark Memorial, Clarke had never been late. Sure, she ran behind some days between her patients, but Clarke was  _ never _ late  _ getting  _ to work. If anything she was always early. 

“M-maybe she overslept? I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about,” Lexa offered, hoping for everything in the universe that her own worry wasn’t showing through. 

Maya chuckled softly, “Clarke loves her sleep but I don’t think she overslept. She never does when she has a shift. I’ve been working with Clarke since she started her residency here and the only time she missed a shift was when she was sick. I hope that’s not the case.”

Flashes of Clarke sitting in the freezing rain flashed through Lexa’s mind. It  _ was  _ possible for the other doctor to be sick, but something along the lines of dread was flowing through Lexa’s viens telling her that it was something else. 

“Her mother went to check on her so hopefully we’ll know something soon,” Maya mumbled as she quickly handed Lexa her next file before looking back over her phone. 

“I hope so,” Lexa whispered to herself, trying to erase Clarke’s broken face from her mind. 

Lexa opened the folder, fully ready to  _ try  _ and put Clarke out of her mind long enough to focus on treating her patients. She briefly heard the sound of the phone ringing at Maya’s desk, which could mean either a patient with a question or an incoming ambulance arrival, as she began walking down the hallway. 

“Dr. Woods! Wait!”

Lexa turned back to see Maya running around her desk, eyes wild as she looked out the entrance of the ambulance, the sound of sirens blaring louder with each passing second.

“What is it, Ms. Vie?”

“It’s Clarke.”

* * *

“Is anyone going to tell me what fucking happened or are you just going to let me guess?” Lexa seethed as she donned a pair of latex gloves. “I need to know so I can treat her!”

Lexa felt her vision beginning to tunnel as she stared down at the still form of Clarke on the gurney. Blood soaked from a significantly sized gash into blonde tresses, turning them into a coppery matted mess, and Lexa sent a silent prayer to the universe that there was no brain damage. Thankfully, other than a possibly broken arm and some possibly fractured ribs, the head wound seemed to be the only major injury. 

“She was involved in a pile up on the freeway,” One of the paramedics explained as they readied to move her onto the hospital bed. “Some drunk guy side swiped her, made her crash into the wall and spin out. Got hit by a few other cars who didn’t have time to stop. She was unconscious when we arrived, and hasn't regained consciousness at all.”

Lexa didn’t want to think of Clarke being smashed around inside her car. The thought of it alone was almost enough to have her heaving into the nearest trash can. 

“Okay, move her  _ carefully  _ and then leave so my team and I can work on her.”

She didn’t care about the comment one of the other paramedics made about her being ‘rude’ and ‘bossy’, the only thing Lexa cared about was getting Clarke to open her eyes. Lexa didn’t even wait for the paramedic to fully move out of her way before she was shoving herself between him and Clarke’s bed, pinlight in hand to check Clarke’s pupil reactivity. 

Lexa heaved a sigh of relief as Clarke’s pupils constricted.

“Pupils reactive,” Lexa threw at one of the nurses as she pocketed the pinlight and began carefully prodding at Clarke’s head wound. Blood barely seeped from the gash now, most of the surrounding mess was from when the wound first opened, which was a good sign. “Call ahead to CT, I want it clear  _ now _ . Tell them it’s for Dr. Griffin.”

Lexa checked over Clarke’s vitals and ran through basic procedures in her head, making sure that she hadn’t forgotten anything in her haste. After determining that Clarke was stable and okay to move, she gestured for the nurses to help her unlock the wheels of the bed and lifted the side railings. 

“We get her there fast but carefully, do you understand?” Lexa announced, satisfied when the nurses all nodded in understanding. “Good, let’s go.”

The walk to the CT room was like a never ending journey for Lexa. It seemed like the hallways stretched for miles, the elevator felt like it took ten years to lift them one floor above, and each passing second Lexa could feel her chest constricting more and more. As they continued down the hallway towards the CT room, Lexa couldn’t help but let her eyes travel over Clarke’s form. Her heart stuttered as she eyed the gash at her temple, the neck brace keeping her neck immobile, the pulse oximeter clipped to her index finger...all of it was almost too much for Lexa. 

“You’re going to be okay,  _ Klark _ ,” Lexa whispered quietly as she brushed her thumb over Clarke’s hand.

* * *

_ Fifteen hours.  _

Fifteen hours since Lexa had started her shift this morning. 

Fourteen hours and thirty-three minutes since Clarke had been wheeled into the ER. 

Thirteen hours and eight minutes since Clarke’s CT Scan showed there was  _ no _ brain or spinal cord damage. 

Twelve hours and fifty-two minutes since Dr. Jaha had removed Lexa from Clarke’s room, stating that she was ‘too close’ to Clarke and something about the AMA Code of Medical Ethics.

Twelve hours and fifty minutes since Lexa had all but screamed in Dr. Jaha’s face, telling him that she wasn’t going anywhere, refusing to let any doctor other than herself treat Clarke. 

Twelve hours and forty-nine minutes since Dr. Jaha put Lexa on unpaid leave for two weeks for her behavior and wouldn’t let her into Clarke’s room. 

Twelve hours and twenty minutes since Lexa had all but locked herself in the on-call room. The same room - _ same bed _ \- that she and Clarke had been on  _ yesterday _ .

Lexa was currently sitting on the floor, back leaning against said bed, head resting against her knees as she tried to calm her shattering heart, not once moving. Clarke was okay, she was  _ fine _ . Her tests came back with positive results and the tests that were run after Lexa had been forced out were just as positive as the first. Lexa thanked every star for never getting on Maya’s bad side since she was the only one that was willing to give her updates on Clarke. Clarke’s mother, Abby Griffin, who Lexa had met only once before, had shown up about two hours after her daughter had been admitted, having been caught in the traffic the accident had caused. She had not left Clarke’s room since her arrival, giving Lexa no opportunity to ask to see Clarke, knowing that if anyone could get away with defying Jaha’s rules, it would be Abby. 

“I just want to know she’s okay,” Lexa whispered brokenly into the silent room.

With all the time she had to think, Lexa had convinced herself that Clarke’s accident was  _ her fault _ . If she wouldn’t have let leave the way she did last night then maybe things would have been different. Clarke wouldn’t have gone home upset. She probably wouldn't have had trouble sleeping like Lexa suspected she had, what with the bags under her eyes. Trouble sleeping meant she might have almost overslept, and almost oversleeping probably put Clarke a little behind, which probably put her right into the path of the drunk driver. 

Lexa had put Clarke’s life in danger.  _ Lexa _ had almost gotten  _ Clarke _ ki-.

“You’re thinking really hard right now, aren’t you? That’s probably where the smell of smoke is coming from.”

Lexa’s head snapped up, almost giving herself whiplash, as she heard the voice she was most desperate to her. She sprang to her feet and within milliseconds was upon Clarke’s slouched form and checking over every inch that was visible through the hospital gown. 

“ _ Klark _ , you shouldn’t be up. You should be in bed,” Lexa rushed out as she carefully trailed her fingers near the gash on Clarke’s head. 

“I’m fine. I just have a slight concussion and two fractured ribs. Oh, and this,” Clarke lazily smiled as she held up her right arm wrapped in a green cast. “Do you like the color? It reminds me of your eyes.” 

The breath in her lungs caught at the small confession, “You’re still a little high on pain meds, aren’t you?”

“Just a little,” Clarke confirmed before staring at Lexa with a soft gaze. 

“What?”

Clarke looked down and shuffled her feet slowly, “ I think this is the longest we’ve gone without arguing since we met.”

“Really?” Lexa laughed. “That’s what you’re thinking about right now?”

Clarke shrugged sluggishly and Lexa could see that standing was starting to take a toll on her by the way her body swayed with each passing second. Lexa chuckled under her breath before moving behind Clarke. 

“What are you doing?” Clarke inquired before being swooped into Lexa’s arms, a small squeak following as she wrapped her arms around Lexa’s neck. 

“You’re in no condition to be standing right now. You should still be in bed. I have no idea who would even let you leave when you ha-.”

“No one let me leave,” Clarke chimed as Lexa set her on  _ their  _ bed. “I asked my mom to go get me something from the cafeteria and after she left I waited for all the nurses to be too busy to notice I was gone. I had to bribe Maya to not sell me out and tell me where you were.”

Lexa sat carefully on the edge of the, eyes trailing over Clarke’s form slowly. 

“Why...why  _ did you come _ looking for me? I thought...last night…,” Lexa’s throat constricted and felt the words catch in her throat.

“Because my mom asked Maya when she came to visit, and I quote, “was that Lexa Woods who I saw yelling at Thelonious when I walked in?”. I asked Maya what had happened and she said you wouldn’t let anyone else treat me and that Jaha put you on leave for behavior.” 

Lexa stared down at her hands, expecting to feel shame settle in her bones but instead felt numb. 

“Lexa,” Clarke whispered. “Jaha was talking about terminating you for your behavior. I got my mom to talk him down but...Lexa,  _ what happened _ ?”

“I-I…,” Lexa stuttered, head shaking as she looked up at Clarke. “I know I’ve obviously made you feel like I don’t care about you but I do  _ Klark _ . More so than I thought before and I couldn’t...I couldn’t stand to see you like that - _ like this _ \- and I just didn’t trust anyone but myself to touch you.”

Ocean blue eyes softened at her words and Lexa felt a warm hand settle over her own. 

“L-Lexa, I don’t know wh-.”

Lexa raised her hand, cupping Clarke’s cheek and cutting her off mid sentence as brushed her thumb over her bottom lip. 

“I want to tell you,  _ Klark _ . Why I am the way I am. Why I’m so cold towards others and why I prefer to work alone,” Lexa said as she searched Clarke’s face. “I want to tell you.”

Clarke nodded slowly, “Okay.”

Lexa shuffled a bit closer, her hand falling to play with a stray blonde curl that fell over Clarke’s shoulder. 

“I had a high school sweetheart and her name was Costia. We met at a summer camp and ended up actually going to the same school. We were inseparable. After graduating we decided to go to the same college,” Lexa dropped the curl she was playing with and trailed her fingers down Clarke’s arm. “Right before graduation Costia got sick. Cancer. It wasn’t treatable and she died two days after graduation. After that I buried myself in medical school and told myself I’d never love again. That I couldn’t go through the pain I felt when I lost Cosita.”

Clarke’s fingers swiped away a tear that Lexa hadn’t even realized had fallen.

“You can stop if you need to,” Clarke whispered. 

“No, I’m fine. I need to get this out,” Lexa said with deep breath. “After medical school, I started my residency at Azgeda Memorial. I tried to stay to myself most of the time but I ended up getting along with a few other residents. There was one in particular, her name was Ontari, and she seemed nice enough...at first anyway. We were paired to work together a lot of the time and we became fast friends and despite telling myself that I wouldn’t love again...I started to fall for her. Our third year of our residency we started dating. Nothing too serious, just kind of seeing how things went. I thought I was going to finally be able to open myself to someone again after all that pain.” 

She could hear Clarke sigh softly, “But?”

Lexa laughed bitterly, “But I was wrong. One day I wasn’t scheduled to come in but the hospital ended up being short staffed so I volunteered. I knew Ontari was working that night so I figured I could surprise her. When I was about to walk into the locker room I could hear her talking with some of the other residents about me. How I acted like a know-it-all and was stuck up and she was only using me for a ‘good lay. Also turned out that she’d been removing my name from any patients we’d worked on together and was claiming the work, all the diagnoses, correctly treating patients, paperwork... _ everything _ , so that she could get herself ahead of everyone else. Be the top resident and all. I didn’t even think something like that was even possible but she did it.”

Lexa smiled softly as she felt Clarke’s hand wrap around her own firmly. 

“I left the locker room after that. I didn’t want to say something and have to work with her all day and it be awkward or whatever. I decided I would confront her that night after our shift ended. Too bad it got worse after that,” Lexa muttered. “There was a position at Johns Hopkins Hospital that I’d had my eye on for a few months. They were looking for top third year residents and I just  _ knew  _ that I could get in. I had applied two weeks before the whole locker room thing...and it turned out so did Ontari. We were all in the locker room getting ready to end our shift when she got an email... _ the  _ email.” 

Green eyes glanced up at a silent Clarke, who nodded for her to keep going. 

“She’d been accepted to work at Johns Hopkins and after two seconds of cheering she decided to shove it in my face and confess what she’d been doing. She let it all out in front of all the other residents and it turned out none of them even liked me to begin with, that’s why none of them ever said anything to me about what she’d been doing. Ontari left for Baltimore the next day and I was left with that same pain, if not even worse because I’d been humiliated by almost everyone I worked with,” Lexa said shakily. “I  _ vowed  _ to never let anyone else in. Not a coworker, not friends, though I had none to begin with. I kept to myself as much as the job would allow and then I would go home to no one but myself. It was easier that way.”

Lexa tightened her hand around Clarke’s. 

“So I stayed at Azgeda for my fourth year of residency and also my first year as attending. After that I thought it was time for a change up. Somewhere where no one would know me and I wouldn't have to worry about what someone thought of me because there wouldn’t be anything to know other than my name and that I was a doctor. I searched a few different hospitals but I was drawn to Ark Memorial. It took about four months before my transfer was accepted and during that time I studied the map of the hospital so I wouldn’t have to ask where things were or anything. I prepared myself to come in needing no help or having to work with anyone because that went so well for me the first time,” Lexa shrugged, with a bitter smile. “But I wasn’t prepared for who I’d meet on my first day here.”

Green locked with widening blue and Lexa smiled softly. 

“When Dr. Jaha talked about you he made you out to be this  _ amazing  _ doctor, how you’d turned out so much like your mother and exceeded all their expectations. Though, not once did he mention how hot-headed you were,” Lexa laughed as Clarke pushed at her shoulder. “Then he introduced you to me and I was already on the fence about having to meet  _ anyone _ . You were  _ nice  _ the entire time and part of me wanted to be okay with that but the part of me that was still hurting wouldn’t let me. I thought keeping you at arm’s length was the best option for myself and that I could learn to ignore you most of the time.”

“But you were wrong?” Clarke questioned hopefully. 

Lexa let out a genuine laugh, “ _ So  _ wrong. Every argument, every little insult you kept throwing my way just made me want to be closer to you. You always let me know just what you thought of me, you never hid anything. And that was big for me. I was so used to people hiding what they thought of me that you being so open with me just drew me in. Then that day we got into that big argument about the little girl and the sutures, I’d just had so much bottled up at that point and you were saying all those things about not judging me and asking for help and I just had flashbacks from Azgeda. Those overwhelmed me and I panicked when I realized I was starting to let you in. That’s why I flipped on you the way I did so I tried leaving but then you grabbed me and  _ I just couldn’t stop myself _ . I wanted you in  _ some _ kind of way and I thought that fuck buddies with no feelings mixed in was better than nothing. So I kissed you and I wished on everything that you would accept me and you did.”

A small silence fell between them as Lexa let her confession settle. Her nerves almost got the best of her after the first five seconds but Lexa gave time for Clarke to process everything. 

“And you were still too scared of getting hurt to tell me all of this then, right?”

“Yes,” Lexa nodded, looking down at their hands. 

Clarke dipped her head, catching Lexa’s eyes and making her look into her favorite blue eyes, “Then what changed?”

Lexa gazed over Clarke’s face, eyes catching the fully stitched gash before lowering to stop on the cast encasing her arm, fingers trailing over it gently. 

“For a second I thought I was going to lose you when they rolled you out of the ambulance. Last night, I knew I’d lost you in a way but you were still  _ here _ . When they brought you in and no one was telling me anything and I saw the gash I was almost sure they were going to tell me you had irreversible brain damage or something. That’s when I realized I didn’t want to lose you, at all. I wanted those little arguments, the insults. I wanted to see the little crease between your eyebrows when you get frustrated with me, and wanted to see you stick your tongue out every time you’re focusing on your patient. I wanted everything that is you,  _ Klark _ ,” Lexa said as she once again cupped Clarke’s cheek. “Just like I realized I was falling for you when I kissed you in here. I knew next to nothing about you but I just knew I was falling and I don’t know how you did that to me.”

Lexa let a small smile break out across her face as Clarke’s eyes misted over and she let out a sudden laugh. 

“That’s funny, because I realized I was falling for you in here, too.”

Green eyes startled open at Clarke’s words, “You... what?”

“Well, duh,” Clarke laughed. “What did you think my calling you out in the parking lot was about?”

Lexa’s jaw fell open, eyes blinking owlishly to try and rid themselves of the shock, “I thought you were just fed up with my act. That you were tired of me giving you the cold shoulder but still sleeping with you, I guess. I don’t know anymore now.”

“You, Lexa, are seriously dense. I  _ was  _ fed up with your act but it was  _ because  _ I was falling for you that I was fed up with it. I couldn’t take the back and forth anymore. The way you made me feel and then just acting like it never happened. I mean, I get hiding it from people but when we were alone and you never played into the sexual tension even a little bit and was just nothing but cold. It was frustrating and drove me crazy. Add that to the fact that I was starting to want  _ more _ …,” Clarke shook her head, not wanting to finish the thought. 

“Well,” Lexa breathed softly, her hand cupping the back of Clarke’s neck and pulling her closer so that their lips were barely brushing. “You can have  _ more _ ...if you still want me?”

Before Lexa knew what was happening Clarke was surging forward and crashing their lips together in a bruising kiss. Lexa moaned into the kiss, carefully pulling Clarke into her lap, mindful of her cast and ribs. The kiss was gentle yet intense, sending a hazy rush through Lexa’s body at every little push and pull. 

“More,” Clarke gasped as she broke away. “I definitely want more of you. If  _ you  _ still want  _ me _ ?”

Lexa brushed the tip of her nose over Clarke’s, just like she’d done after their first kiss. 

“I’m starting to think I’ll always want you,  _ Klark _ .”

Clarke let out a watery laugh as she dove back in to keep kissing Lexa. She wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, just enjoying the feel of their lips running together, smiling and giggling through every few kisses. Everything that she’d felt leading up to this moment, Costia, Ontari...it caused her hardships, some that Lexa wished for no other person to go through, but she’d endure them all over again if it meant that she would end up here, with Clarke. 

Lexa broke away from Clarke’s lips, knowing that she had to let them both breathe at some point. She placed a few kisses to the other doctor’s jaw, trailing up to her temple to press a few feather light kisses to the bandages there. 

“Who would’ve thought we’d fall in love in an on-call room.”

**Author's Note:**

> This work was unexpected and I had a few rough patches while writing it and was scared it wouldn't be finished in time, but I'm so glad I was able to push through and get it done! I'm very proud of this one and I hope enough people like it and would hopefully like to read a part 2! ;) For those of you who can catch every little detail there is in a fic, you probably noticed that I didn't dive into Lexa's thoughts as far as her being the cause(obviously not really) of Clarke's accident and yes, that is on purpose. One, this fic already got away from me and was much longer than anticipated so there were some things I needed to cut, plus I thought it would be something that would be discussed in part 2 if it happens. ;)
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and supporting Clexa week. Myself and all the other authors, artists, content creators, the like, all appreciate everything that everyone does to keep our fics and this fandom alive! We would not be where we were today without everyone supporting each other! So thank you everyone! Thank you for reading, for sharing, commenting, leaving kudos. It means more to us than you can imagine! :)
> 
> Until next time lovelies! 
> 
> Love to all!
> 
> Xoxo
> 
> FIGHT LIKE LEXA


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